Still Photos of the Mind

They say that every couple must take good pictures and do a video of their wedding. They say that after the food is eaten up, the bouquet is tossed and the guests head back home, the only things you'll have left from it all are the pictures and videos.

I will be the first to tell you that pictures and videos really are important. And if you've seen photos taken by really good photographers, you know how having a really nice set of shots of yourselves can make you feel really nice. My wife and I had a bit of a nightmare with our photographer, and in hindsight he may not have been the best choice (but why we 'chose' him is a long, unimportant story). He was a problem on many levels, and in the end, we were left disappointed with his work and his effort. For months we tried by ourselves to make some magic with what we were given by him, and in the end had some moderate results. It doesn't help, though, that I've seen fantastic wedding shots from friends' weddings, and every now and then I feel a sense of regret that we didn't make the choices they made.

Every now and then, though, I take a critical look at the obsession with glamour photography. The first thought I have centres around the false reality of sepia, and b & w, and enhanced colours, and touch-ups. If I did have 15 bumps on my cheek on my wedding day, why should my photos say any different? If there was real light in the room, why should the photos look soft?

I like to say that " 'Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder' is something that ugly people say." And the point of that is, people will say whatever they need to say to make them feel better. And maybe that's my problem... whenever I "take a critical look at the obsession with glamour photography" I'm really just trying to find ways to comfort myself - I mean, hey, who doesn't like stunning pictures?

In the middle of all this thought, however, I've made a revelation that took over a year to occur to me. Pictures are important, yes. Videos are important, yes. But after the food is eaten up, the bouquet is tossed and the guests head back home, you're left with something else... you're left with the memories. You can do anything you want to do with your videos. You can use a point-and-shoot camera for your pics, or pick the best SLR and the most expensive photographer with the best photoshop skills. But you can't tweak your memories. And I can honestly say that there's nothing on earth more special than the way I felt on my wedding day.